Two of the things that most humans desire and strive for in their lives are predictability and stability. Both were in short supply over the past twelve months.
One can say with a great deal of certainty that the past year was a truly bizarre one. Old political and social mores and conventions seemed irrelevant, even as a clear path to the future hasn’t as yet been defined and carved. What lies ahead for the country, and the world is anyone’s guess. Who will be the winners and losers of society? Will a select few thrive while others regress? What changes and surprises lie in store for most of us? As the year thankfully draws to a close, unpredictability and uncertainty hang over the future like a dense fog hiding what’s underneath this morass. There is a certain tentativeness in the air, as many crave and long for solutions where none perhaps exist – or are anywhere in sight.
Humorist Dave Barry offers his unique take on events during the past year that consumed our attention like a good horror movie, always unsure of the next nightmarish scene.
Looking back on 2017 is like waking up after a party where you made some poor decisions, such as drinking tequila squeezed from the underpants of a person you do not really know. (At least you hope it was tequila.)
The next day finds you lying naked in a Dumpster in a different state, smeared from head to toe with a mixture of Sriracha sauce and glitter. At first you remember nothing. But then, as your throbbing brain slowly reboots, memories of the night before, disturbing memories, begin creeping into your consciousness. As the full, hideous picture comes into focus, you curl into a ball, whimpering, asking yourself over and over: Did that really happen?
That’s how we feel about 2017. It was a year so surreal, so densely populated with strange and alarming events, that you have to seriously consider the possibility that somebody… was putting LSD in our water supply. A bizarre event would occur, and it would be all over the news, but before we could wrap our minds around it, another bizarre event would occur, then another and another, coming at us faster and faster, battering the nation with a Category 5 weirdness hurricane that left us hunkering down, clinging to our sanity, no longer certain what was real.